A to Z backwards part 1

I started this blog back in February to provide a place where child counsellors and therapists could find something to read, something that rang a bell, some information, and maybe also some resources they might otherwise miss. That still stands. But for a couple of weeks, while I’m technically on holiday, I am going to construct an A to Z of all the little things that come together somewhere in a therapist’s life but which would hardly demand the attention of a whole posting. Starting with Z – just to be different!

Z
This is zero. I can think of nothing about my work this last year that I would prefer to have changed or done differently. Not, you understand, because I am perfect but because I have decided resolutely not to apply hindsight in a punitive way when I know I did the best I could on the day with the skill I had at the time. I do hope to learn from reflection, of course, but that’s for R, not Z.

Y
Youth – the more I meet with young people (and I’ve been doing it for many years in various ways, like lots of you), the more I love them. They are sparky, imaginative, unspoilt, naive, passionate, in your face and playful. And if they come to me damaged, then sparky is how I want to return them to being. Not conforming, dulled, resigned, aggressive. When they start teasing me and joking along, without it being in defense of a fragile self, I know they’re ready for off.

X
This stands for xenocryst. Let me explain. I was stuck for a word, obviously. But I then discovered quite by chance that xenocryst refers to a crystal in an igneous rock which is not derived from the original magma. Now I am always interested in metaphor and this immediately struck me as exactly the description I’d apply to whatever precious result emerges from therapy that seems totally unconnected to my plans and makes me say: “Wow – this happened despite my lovely theories and is the perfect solution. Fancy me facilitating that!”

W
This is the wolf I’m trying to keep from the door. As I write, I have next to me a bill for my BACP Find a Therapist Directory entry, a tax bill for my earnings, a Yellow Pages bill for my counselling entry, and a road tax bill (I drive to some schools). I just paid my public liability insurance. All in one month. I may as well let Mr Wolf in and accept that helping people leads to starvation of the body – but definitely not of the soul. And that’s all that matters, I guess.

W is also for what’s on soon – and I found the BPS conference about children and young people taking place in September with a great line-up of speakers and workshops. Will the wolf let me attend, though?